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Husband and wife join forces to tell their stories while they review New York City's hottest restaurants.

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November 2012
September 2012
July 2012

Posts for July 2012

July 16, 2012
July 02, 2012

SheView: Beauty & Essex

This past Saturday at 7:00 pm Eastern standard time, my yoga teacher married Alec Baldwin. I just can't believe MY adorable sassypants yoga teacher married Alec Baldwin. Paparazzi and security hovered the Nolita streets outside St. Patrick’s Basilica church. Nope! I wasn't invited (all of 30 Rock was, along with Lorne Michaels and WOODY ALLEN), but I did partially stalk and enjoy the fanfare, well… maybe more than partially. Still, despite the fun and excitement, I don't think you can be a yogi and marry Alec Baldwin. He doesn't quite seem zen; instead he seems angry and volatile - the opposite of a yogi (even one associated through matrimony). As for her, I didn't know yogis can be sell-outs just like everyone else (aren’t they more in tune with mind/body/soul)... changing their look and their lifestyle for their spouse, for notoriety and money. I kinda don't want to practice yoga anymore; my chi is off.

I wonder if Alec ohms... I bet it's not when he's practicing Vinyasa on University ;). Let's see how long this one lasts - I give it five max with one little Baldwin heir. (Hey---Just like Katie and Tom.) Egomaniacs - maybe not best to marry ‘em but if you do - the huge cash payout won't suck!!

Beauty & Essex

Beauty and Essex, located on the LES, is the nighttime area where I and my pals used to get down - restaurants, hotels, bars and lounges. I used to wear (quite possibly) backless shirts down there. Oy. Tonight, I settled into a comfy cool cotton boho look and we taxied to our old stomping grounds and passed ole watering holes. Beauty was bumping despite our early time reservation. Space is huge including a front storefront where you can buy both new and vintage pieces - think: shoes, clutches, jewels or a whole other modgepodge of what to me seemed useless - signed baseball cards, pez dispensers and Star Wars paraphernalia. Seemed a bit confused but definitely different, kitsch and I longed for the hand crystallized Shay bags (casually starting at $2000) that were to die for. I was secretly hoping that HeView would get drunk enough, forgo our rent dough and diapers.com sheckels and buy me one of these stunners. No dice. Maybe Alec will buy one maybe two for Hilaria. Def more likely.

As we walked into the great room, we were seated immediately in view of a beautiful glass roof and tons of different sorts of people (oldies, nerdy Asian businessmen, hen parties, B&T, dates, etc). The waitstaff are decked in skin tight purple dresses whether they have shelves, rolls or too much ink hanging all out. We ordered cocktails stat, for me the Beauty Elixir and for He some cracked out Arnold Palmer (both refreshing and favorable). The menu is extensive and we decided to pick and share from each section: from the "toasts" a peachy yet spicy ricotta bread (eh). From the raw bar, their signature lobster tacos (looks better than tastes) and these mouth watering spoonfuls (4) of chicken fried oysters (ah-mazing). From the accessories, we ordered both the sweet corn (cool, spicy and refreshing) and truffled onion rings with blue cheese dressing (2 die 4)... And, Lastly, the scallops came - cooked perfectly over a bed of starchy corn risotto. The food came right out - faster than the now Baldwins nuptials. Even after saying slow-it-down, we still were served and cleared in the blink of an eye. Much to my chagrin, this aspect of B&E was unenjoyable, although the physical space/decor (mirrors, pearls, lockets, oh my) rocked along with the tasty food (chef/owner of Stanton Social, which dirty hot waitress said is still "cool") and helped redeem the super speedy slightly offensive service. In and out, at B&E, quite possibly like the celebrity marriages we pry on or people's personas. I probably will return to yoga with my celebrity teacher but Beauty and Essex (I think) has been scratched off my NYC restaurant bucket list! 146 Essex Street | Between Stanton and Rivington (212) 614-0146


July 02, 2012

HeView: Beauty & Essex

“It’s the little things that make a big difference.”

As they say, “expressions become expressions for a reason.”

It’s just not until you’ve been a recipient of an aforementioned little thing that you realize that an expression like the first came about as a result of differences made. Thanks Sheview. Now can you please get us into a restaurant with a high-end pawnshop in its entrance so we can do some proper people watching?

Beauty & Essex

Beauty and Essex sounds like something on the corner of a made-up location straight out of the deep crevices of my NYC-centric mind, right next to carefree Saturday night plans with the guys, “going out” and both hitting and striking out on girls. Luckily, now that I am (definitely) older and (maybe) wiser, I recognize the greatness in this not only being a night sans guys, but it was a night sans anyone else but HeView and SheView – for the first time in a long time! We walked in and gazed at the wares being peddled in the “pawn shop” – a room in the entrance that is 100% meant to be dark but was awkwardly positioned in the flooding sunshine. SheView kept talking about about Alec Baldwin… I’m pretty sure he must have had some memorabilia in one of the cases. When we were led in to our table – in the way back of a huge room and positioned perfectly to uncomfortably stare at all the people (consisting of fathers and daughters, bachelorette parties, dates and tourists in every sense) we could silently judge, we figured this would be an enjoyable couple of hours. While the time we did spend was actually enjoyable, I’ve been writing this review for a longer slice of time than Beauty, Essex or anyone else on the ownership team would have cared for us to spend in their restaurant. Needless to say, we were immediately greeted by our very dirty-hot waitress whose skintight outfit did not leave a lot to my imagination. Dying of thirst and looking at their specialty cocktail list, Earl the Pearl sounded like a no-brainer – an Arnold Palmer with vodka and mint syrup. This drink was outstanding and I stopped at one, more out of fear for not being able to. Three minutes after our drinks were served and exactly eight minutes before our first plate arrived, dirty-hot took our order and helped us along the way. We decided to try a little of everything tonight and started with Whipped Ricotta on Toast with Peaches, Chicken Fried Oysters with Apple and Bacon Braised Spinach and Lobster Tacos with Red Cabbage Slaw and Jalapeno Cream. The toast, referred to by the brilliant business minds behind this machine as “Jewels on Toast” looked good, but was really just a pile of rusted metal in a Tiffany box. The Chicken Fried Oysters were outstanding – flavorful, light and really just perfect in a simple bite. SheView did not enjoy the Lobster Tacos, which was great for me as I enjoyed taking down two out of three. For mains we had the Scallops, which were fantastic, along with Skillet Roasted Corn with Chipotle, Lime and Cotija Cheese and the Onion Ring Tempura with Buttermilk Bleu Cheese Dip (and ketchup). The corn looked way better than it tasted and the Onion Rings were, as they say, a little thing that brightened up a too-rushed experience for a couple of married cats trying to enjoy a Saturday night. This place is past its prime anway. Next time we’re on to bigger things. 146 Essex Street | Between Stanton and Rivington (212) 614-0146


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